There's a bus that never comes, except in threes.
There's a train that never runs, because of leaves.
[an extremely offensive line deleted]
And there's a toaster that always burns the bread.*
In a town North-east of England, the weather's always freezing.
And the girls parade around in inappropriate clothing.
*Earlier in the show, Lee makes fun of jokes such as "I hate my toaster. It's only got two settings: Black burned charcol or only warm bread."